Strangers and Intimates

This book is about the notion of privacy and the concept of a private life as opposed to a public one. Tiffany Jenkins is a social and cultural historian who brings her unique perspective to the subject and takes the reader through history, starting with Ancient Greece and tracing it all the way to the present day.

She examines the way private life has been defined and thought of through various periods in history,  the rise and fall of the perceived importance of privacy in the life of the individual, and the concept of an interior life and the necessity of cultivating it in order to develop a true sense of self.

In the ancient world the public and the private were strictly separate realms. People had a public persona that they cultivated and presented to the world. Public life was open only to free men, (women and slaves were confined to the home) and it was considered superior to private life.

This changed with time, until in the medieval world there was very little separation between the public and the private. Then came the concept of the self as something that needed to be nurtured and cultivated and the idea that solitude was necessary to accomplish this.

Jenkins writes about the role of religion in people's lives and changes in sexual mores over time. She describes the Victorian era where private and family life was considered to be sacred and inviolate while there was a push for more openness in the public realm with citizens engaging in public discourse and weighing in on the issues of the day. 

She writes extensively about the twentieth century, the rise of reality TV and tabloid journalism alongside the feminist movement who pushed for greater openness about family life, particularly issues like domestic violence and spousal abuse. This, in some ways, led to talk shows where celebrities as well as ordinary people began to share their private troubles and personal struggles on TV. 

All of which seems quaint in the age of the internet and social media where everyone seems to constantly be sharing all manner of details about themselves on various platforms, posting pictures. chasing likes and seeking validation from strangers. All while companies and governments constantly surveil us and collect every bit of data they can.  This is not a good state of affairs, but it's the one we have and the one we need to deal with both on a personal and societal level.

This is a remarkable book, packed full of the most interesting details both historical and modern. It's well written and provides much food for thought. It can get dense at times and it's not really a book to read at a go, but that's a minor quibble.